i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
