Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
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