just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
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