I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
