But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
