does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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