Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize