whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize