is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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