Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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