I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
