The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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