If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
