Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
false alarm. still invincible.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If I die, sorry about rent.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
