he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Just pee around me
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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