If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Is it because I queefed?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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