If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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