dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
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