I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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