the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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