You're my little dorito
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
