I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Its about making memories worth repressing
and she was petting her beer can
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I will pee on everything he values.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize