Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
