btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
