She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize