Got a toothbrush?
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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