How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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