Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
