how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
