Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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