Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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