Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
