ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
