dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
