I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
