did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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