"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
