Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
