My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
