At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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