So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Drunk is not a location!
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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