Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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