the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
