singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize