I CAN MOONWALK!
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
