going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
