I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
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