Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
