Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
my sisters under your porch take her home
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
