But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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