Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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